Sunrise at High Noon

LAUDERDALE-BY-THE-SEA, Florida – First off, Happy Easter! Rebecca and I started this blessed day with a sunrise service in the courtyard near our hotel. It featured contemporary dancers, a church choir and an uplifting meditation by the pastor from the Community Church here.

All in all, a wonderful morning. It’s only 10 a.m., and I feel rejuvenated. And hungry.

Sitting around the pool yesterday, I was chatting with our Toronto pals, Paul and Jimmy. They had just arrived on Friday with their lovely wives.

We got to talking about my Heart Matters Blog, when Paul (a.k.a., “Magg,” sounds like badge) said someday he would like to write a blog post. He didn’t actually say that, but it was close: “I would like to do that thing where you put a post in a pipe and smoke it.”

I knew what he meant, which scared the heck out of me.

Apparently, blogging is something that’s been a lifelong dream for him. Sort of like bungee jumping, dating a supermodel or playing hockey for the Toronto Maple Leafs. It’s important to set reasonable goals.

Since Paul had virtually no knowledge of blogging, I offered to help him get started. He had been kicking around some ideas in his head, which should have been encouraging. Here’s his first draft:

“Greetings, fellow bloggers and blogettes.

This is my blog.

The end.

Thanks for reading.

With love & light, Paul”

Terse, concise and polite. Not at all unexpected from this kind, courteous and lovable Canadian. (He paid me $20 in American money to say that.)

“Might need some work,” I said gently.

I offered him some tips for beginning bloggers, and Paul tossed out possible topics:

• Write about something you know. Find your niche: ”You mean like wine, women and song?” Me: No. Just no.

• Write about something interesting that you think others might enjoy. Research your audience: “Like that time in high school when Jimmy and I were out and got home so late that he slept in the truck before going to work for my father?” Me: Not exactly.

• Write something about travel. Draw on your experiences: “Like that time when the four of us drove to Maine and stopped at a prison gift shop and bought a handmade cutting board signed by the inmate/artist?” Me: Better.

• Write about something so outrageous that no one would believe it. Use visuals: “Oh, like …” he began.

Wait, Paul. How about this twisted little tale, Paul? It includes surprise, intrigue and deception, Paul.

You know the story, Paul:

Like the time four Motown girls staying at the Sea Foam/High Noon Resort opened their door the day after arriving and found two bottles of wine – red and white – on their doorstep. They were so surprised that they asked everyone they saw if they were the ones who had left the wine. They all said no, so then the girls figured it had to be those kind, courteous and lovable Canadians from Toronto who were driving down in a few days and enjoyed good wine so much. It all made sense that it had to be them.

So, the girls called Paul, who was still on the road with his wife, Beverly, and their friends, Jimmy and Parise, and asked if they had left wine outside their door. Paul said, “What? Um, well, yes.” Then he hung up. Intriguing.

The girls were so touched, until the next day when they found out TOTALLY BY ACCIDENT from Jimmy (on Holy Saturday, for God’s sake!) that the wine wasn’t from them at all, and that Paul had just said it was because he thought, “Well, um, it could have been from us.”

Turns out, the gift of wine actually came from the High Noon owners thanking the girls for being such loyal longtime guests.

See? Now that’s a good blog post, Jimmy and Paul, you dirty rotten scoundrels!