You’re in trouble?

Lookalike couples have captured public fascination for years. There’s even scientific proof that some dogs and their owners often look similar.

Familiarity breeds content. (See what I did there?)

In my 60-plus years, though, I have never heard of owners and their pets taking similar prescription meds – at the same time of day – to slow the advancement of the same disease. But I’m here to tell you: In our house, it’s true.

It has to do with Madison, our 14-year-old Havanese puppy.

Puppy, you ask? Of course, I use that term facetiously, but it suits her, even at Maddie’s advanced age when she’s considered a “senior” dog. Loves those “AARF” discounts.

Stay with me.

Like people, older dogs can develop heart problems, such as valve disease, as in mitral valve regurgitation when it doesn’t close properly. As in what I had surgically repaired back in 2018.

Leaky valve, all fixed, good to go.

Ironically, mitral valve disease is the most common type of heart disease in dogs. Blood flows backward into the left atrium (the upper chamber of the heart) instead of forward and can lead to an enlarged heart. Just like in humans.

Doctors can see this and any fluid on an X-ray, and sometimes will hear a murmur or wheezing when the dog coughs.

In late October, Maddie had all of the above symptoms when she visited our beloved veterinarian, Dr. Tim, of McLaughlin Animal Hospital in Rochester Hills, Mich. He’s one of those people you’re certain would remain calm under the worst circumstances. War, pestilence, greed, disaster?

“Don’t worry, it’s not the end of the world. Well, it is, but don’t panic,” he would say in a soothing Mister Rogers tone minus the red knit cardigan.

With Maddie’s former goose-like honk worsening to a persistent but dry hack, this was definitely serious. He could hear wheezing as her little heart pumped like a drum set pounded by Buddy Rich. (Look him up.)

Doc prescribed Vetmedin to help her heart beat more strongly and dilate blood vessels to relieve pressure on the heart. It’s a large, brownish pill about the size of a Good & Plenty candy. Thankfully, it’s scored and easy to cut in half for her twice daily doses.

Vetmedin has been shown to slow the progress of heart disease in dogs. Better quality of life, and we hope, a longer time on this earth with us.

She’s on an ACE inhibitor, which also acts to dilate blood vessels to reduce the burden on the heart. It’s called Enalapril, a white triangular scored pill that’s simply split.

The third medication, a tiny round white pill called Furosemide, is a diuretic used to dilate blood vessels and cause extra fluid to be removed by the kidneys. This can relieve pressure on her heart and improve symptoms.

It also makes her urinate more often.

That right there is the understatement of 2022, my friends. We’ve got two days left in December, but I’ll bet you can’t top that.

Say it with me: It also makes her urinate more often.

OMG. It’s like housetraining a 3-month-old puppy all over again. Her new nickname (among several others, including LaLa, Maddie Lou and BooBoo) is … Mrs. Pee-a-lot! It’s French.

We have tried doggie diapers, to no avail. She refused to walk turning into a frozen canine statue in the middle of the kitchen silently cursing us to live the rest of our days wearing black slacks covered in cat hair.

Lucky for us, Maddie has taken to using “pee pads” when we’re not home to let her out every 27 minutes. There’s a spray bottle you spritz on the pad before laying it down. Not sure if it works for two-leggeds.

But we don’t take her (Maddie) to visit friends or family as much anymore. Unless we don’t like them.

Today we had some really good news to round out this incredibly bittersweet year. Maddie’s been on the medicines for three weeks and is responding well. No more wheezing or coughing. She’s playful and more like her old bad self.

Doc is pleased with the progress and would like her to continue with the meds, most likely for the rest of her life. Whatever it takes, I said.

Then he looked at me and suddenly became less Mister Rogers and more Mr. Timothy McLaughlin, DVM.

“You do realize the No. 1 cause of death at this stage of their life is …”

I braced myself for what was coming. It’s not what I expected.

He continued. “… euthanasia.”

Excuse me?

“Yes. Because of the increased urination.”

Wait, what?

“Is that a concern?”

You mean like her peeing in the house? Well, no. She uses pee pads. We’ve picked up all of the area rugs and keep a close eye on her when we’re home.

And frankly, if she pees, she pees. (That goes for Madison, too.)

“Glad to hear that. Some people can’t handle it. We could decrease the diuretic, but it may not be as effective in helping her heart.”

No, please don’t change a thing, I said.

Note to self: Bring beach chairs and dog stroller to Florida. There’s plenty of grass by the bay.

Gotta go. Time for our meds.